Depression, poem, Poetry, rain

Water From the Sky

I love the rain and I love its sound.
Like rhythmic drumbeats as it falls around.
Pitter, patter, from the roof and the ground.
It creates its own music that can calm and astound.

I love the rain and I love the shapes it can make.
As random droplets stream down the window pane,
It begins to take form, you’ll see a dragon or a snowflake.
You can see a face, or an overhead map of the terrain.

I love the rain because it can trigger emotions.
Emotions that we store away and release on rainy occasions.
Memories also resurface without our intention.
The rain makes us vulnerable, without asking for permission.

In times like these I question the things I love most.
For the rain is digging up feelings of regret and loss.
The rain spins the reel of photos and memories that I’ve cherished, yet lost.
I feel betrayed and toyed, like the only reason it exists is for a miserable cause.

The rain dampens my mood and makes my thoughts slow down.
The rain brings gloom into my world and it makes me wear a frown.
The rain makes me venture the darkness of the dungeon I have within.

It shows me a boy covered in bruises and mud,
A skinny and short lad who’s an unattractive stud.
It shows me a boy with erratic black pupils,
Fervently scanning the environment for something to kill.

It shows me a boy who has cuts on his wrist and forearm,
A definitive sign of self-loathing and self-harm.
It shows me a boy who likes the dark and gloomy corners of my mind,
A boy who chose to be abandoned, isolated and left behind.

It shows me a boy with tears flowing down his eyes,
While having a maniacal grin I could only hope was a smile.

But though the rain seems to torture me inside,
I still love it and from it, I will never hide.
For it also hold memories of love and peace.
It shows a boy playing and laughing, a boy who is at ease.

A boy who is happy showering in the cooling drops.
A boy who is positive even though his life has seemed to stop.
A boy who describes rain to wash away the stain,
Of yesterday’s heartache, guilt and pain.

The rain holds both end of the spectrum and two sides of the extreme.
That’s why I love the rain because it plays my life on a hazy screen.

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